wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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