Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize