I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize