He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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