I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Alive.
So much puke
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
