It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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