We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
