Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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