I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
