every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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