I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
