No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
