Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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