He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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