there's paper in my vomit.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
