How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
