I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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