"it" just moved
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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