no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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