I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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