It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
