I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize