and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
