Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize