...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
