Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
