Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
