Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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