Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
