Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
