Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
