singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
