The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
You smell like stripper and shame
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize