Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
