so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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