Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
