I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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