Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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