Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
