dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
