Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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