I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Green mimosas i think yes
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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