At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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