I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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