She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
