I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
