How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Randomize
