What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
