I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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