A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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