My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize