Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
