It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
